There are moments in each and every one of our lives , when certain small things happen , which just brightens up your life . No , it will not change your life for ever , but will make you feel alive.
A normal wednesday night , roaming around facebook and planning to go to sleep. Then this happens ,
XXXXX hi Aravind
11:31pmMe hi
11:31pmXXXXX how r u
11:31pmMe good , n u?
I check my huge friend list , and checks his pic .We have some common friends , but i am not able to recognise who he is . I am wondering why he is pinging me , but i always show some courtsey , and decided to ask him something,
11:32pmMe were are you?
11:33pmXXXXX in london
doing my masters
how is life ?
11:33pm Me
life is same
and ordinary
;);)
11:34pmXXXXX
want to tel u sumtng...... saw ur short film. good effort from ur side. can see how much u have worked for it
keep the good work gng!
This is the moment i am talking about ...
11:35pmXXXXX
yum man i was disccussing it wit my frnd
11:35pmXXXXX
huh u r gr8
11:35pmXXXXX
nice
r u working on any such films now?
NO , he is not gay . I am sure he dont even really remember me . I also know i am being overexcited for a small appreciation . I have recieved such appreciations in the past as well . But all i am saying is that , moments like this can make you feel something , something which tells you that there is some good reason why you are alive .
Me
bye
thanks for the suport
:):)
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
The biggest challenge in life !
You know what the biggest challenge in life is ?
It is to identify what you really want in life ., and have the courage to believe and pursue it.
Im 25 years old and i am so confused . The problem is that , i kinda know what i want in life , but i am lacking the courage to pursue it .Let me explain ,
Current situation :
I am a network engineer , i earn a decent salary , i do a nice job , and i live in Chennai. I have loads of friends and contacts in here , i love the place except for the weather.
What i want in life :
I want to be a successful engineer , earning a huge salary. I want to be a writer ,i want to make a movie , i want to run a business , i want to be involved with the film industry and i want to take care of my family . I want to be closer to my girl.
What the problem is :
" Hey , where is your son now ? My son is in US/UK ."
" Hey , where is your brother now ? "
" Hey , so where is your boyfriend ? "
" Why cant he go to US ? "
" Oh , he has never been there ? I been in 3 countries "
" You dont know man , the blondes! Oh , i love Europe "
Another reason , is .., any guesses ?
Ha ha , you got it .Its her !
She is in Europe and loves the place . I am not blaming her , its just the difference in perception . I want to be near to her , and is worried whether i would lose her if we continue this long distance thing for a long time . But if i force her to come back here , she wont be happy . So whats the option left ? She might end up getting a job there , and why would her parents have to think about me then ?
The 'US Mappilai' is available for plenty .
When i think about it , if i really try , i would get a PR . But then , what for ? Work experience ? When it comes to computer engineering , i dont think there is anything much for me to 'experience' in there . Everything there is outsourced here.
How about my movie dreams ? People say that i can still do a course or something there. But , i already have good connections in here , and when it comes to movie industry, contacts are the most important thing .
How about my family ? Do i really want to leave them and live there ?
And all this for what ?
Yes , i love Europe and America , i love football , the snowfall , the culture . But , i just want see all that , i dont want to live there .
If i am a little patient , i am sure i would get a chance to travel . But i am getting impatient .
Why is this happening to me ? Why cant i believe in what i want , and just be patient ?
Am i doing a wrong thing by staying back here ? I am not sure , but i feel this is the right thing . This girl i am speaking about is sensible , and would understand me . But still , certain things confuse me .
What you guys say ? Should i follow what the society is asking me to do or should i follow what my heart says ?
What is more important ? Your dreams or your love ?
Would i be doing a mistake by following what my heart says ? and more importantly , what is the meaning of ,
"Its your call buddy" ???
It is to identify what you really want in life ., and have the courage to believe and pursue it.
Im 25 years old and i am so confused . The problem is that , i kinda know what i want in life , but i am lacking the courage to pursue it .Let me explain ,
Current situation :
I am a network engineer , i earn a decent salary , i do a nice job , and i live in Chennai. I have loads of friends and contacts in here , i love the place except for the weather.
What i want in life :
I want to be a successful engineer , earning a huge salary. I want to be a writer ,i want to make a movie , i want to run a business , i want to be involved with the film industry and i want to take care of my family . I want to be closer to my girl.
What the problem is :
" Hey , where is your son now ? My son is in US/UK ."
" Hey , where is your brother now ? "
" Hey , so where is your boyfriend ? "
" Why cant he go to US ? "
" Oh , he has never been there ? I been in 3 countries "
" You dont know man , the blondes! Oh , i love Europe "
Another reason , is .., any guesses ?
Ha ha , you got it .Its her !
She is in Europe and loves the place . I am not blaming her , its just the difference in perception . I want to be near to her , and is worried whether i would lose her if we continue this long distance thing for a long time . But if i force her to come back here , she wont be happy . So whats the option left ? She might end up getting a job there , and why would her parents have to think about me then ?
The 'US Mappilai' is available for plenty .
When i think about it , if i really try , i would get a PR . But then , what for ? Work experience ? When it comes to computer engineering , i dont think there is anything much for me to 'experience' in there . Everything there is outsourced here.
How about my movie dreams ? People say that i can still do a course or something there. But , i already have good connections in here , and when it comes to movie industry, contacts are the most important thing .
How about my family ? Do i really want to leave them and live there ?
And all this for what ?
Yes , i love Europe and America , i love football , the snowfall , the culture . But , i just want see all that , i dont want to live there .
If i am a little patient , i am sure i would get a chance to travel . But i am getting impatient .
Why is this happening to me ? Why cant i believe in what i want , and just be patient ?
Am i doing a wrong thing by staying back here ? I am not sure , but i feel this is the right thing . This girl i am speaking about is sensible , and would understand me . But still , certain things confuse me .
What you guys say ? Should i follow what the society is asking me to do or should i follow what my heart says ?
What is more important ? Your dreams or your love ?
Would i be doing a mistake by following what my heart says ? and more importantly , what is the meaning of ,
"Its your call buddy" ???
Friday, March 26, 2010
The extramarital affair !!!
Yeah , thats true ... I am involved in an extramarital affair ...
I am married to Network engineering , whom my parents chose . She is lovely , and sexy.I really like her , but , but then ... my love .. Cinema .. I am not able to forget her ...
You know , when i touch the cam , when i design those frames , when i write a dialogue...,you know.., there is no better way to make love in the whole world ...
Now , i am so confused , worried and pissed off . What am i supposed to do ? Yes , for sure i love technology , but do i get an immense feel of comfort when i stand right under the sun at 1 PM in chennai, when i am doing networking ?I doubt it ... Do i feel absolutely nothing for a hot gal ,and see nothing else other than the character , when i am at my desk in office ? I doubt it ...
I dont want to be those people who would turn 60 and tell that , oh god , i could have been a great film maker ... No , NOOOOOOOOOOOO....
But then , can i quit my well paid job , and get my family under debt and lose the girl i want to marry ? No , i cant...
I can tell only one thing my sweetheart cinema .. I will chase you , where ever i go , where ever i reach , i will never leave you,my love for you will never fade...
There will be one day in my life ...When i make you proud with my love ...
I am married to Network engineering , whom my parents chose . She is lovely , and sexy.I really like her , but , but then ... my love .. Cinema .. I am not able to forget her ...
You know , when i touch the cam , when i design those frames , when i write a dialogue...,you know.., there is no better way to make love in the whole world ...
Now , i am so confused , worried and pissed off . What am i supposed to do ? Yes , for sure i love technology , but do i get an immense feel of comfort when i stand right under the sun at 1 PM in chennai, when i am doing networking ?I doubt it ... Do i feel absolutely nothing for a hot gal ,and see nothing else other than the character , when i am at my desk in office ? I doubt it ...
I dont want to be those people who would turn 60 and tell that , oh god , i could have been a great film maker ... No , NOOOOOOOOOOOO....
But then , can i quit my well paid job , and get my family under debt and lose the girl i want to marry ? No , i cant...
I can tell only one thing my sweetheart cinema .. I will chase you , where ever i go , where ever i reach , i will never leave you,my love for you will never fade...
There will be one day in my life ...When i make you proud with my love ...
Monday, March 1, 2010
The girl is here , again !
Actually , i want to hug her tight and kiss her and tell her that I LOVE YOU .
But , i am not doing so. That is because , i am not sure whether she feels the same way i do .And moreover , she needs time . So do i . May be this is still infactuation between us , may be there is a better man for her and better girl for me . We are no one to predict future , are we ?
One thing i am sure about though , is that i want her to be happy . I dont know how much she cares about me , and i dont want to know . All i know is that ,
I care for her ,a lot !
May be we may not get together , but still i want her to be next to me , i want to take care of her , and make her happy .
I thought of telling all this to her , but then , whats the point ? This is something that someone should feel , not force . We have some time to pass between before we may meet again , and at that point , if i feel that she does care for me , i may propose her . Else , i am happy to pass it as a beautiful dream ,something which was never mine .
I know people have started hating this blog , because of this love-bullshitting , but i dont care . This place is only for me , just to write whatever i feel .
But , i am not doing so. That is because , i am not sure whether she feels the same way i do .And moreover , she needs time . So do i . May be this is still infactuation between us , may be there is a better man for her and better girl for me . We are no one to predict future , are we ?
One thing i am sure about though , is that i want her to be happy . I dont know how much she cares about me , and i dont want to know . All i know is that ,
I care for her ,a lot !
May be we may not get together , but still i want her to be next to me , i want to take care of her , and make her happy .
I thought of telling all this to her , but then , whats the point ? This is something that someone should feel , not force . We have some time to pass between before we may meet again , and at that point , if i feel that she does care for me , i may propose her . Else , i am happy to pass it as a beautiful dream ,something which was never mine .
I know people have started hating this blog , because of this love-bullshitting , but i dont care . This place is only for me , just to write whatever i feel .
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Love - Pheno Vs Menon
Yea , i know it sounds stupid , silly and seriously bullshit .
But , i cant help it ,at 25 years and 5 months , i realise that love exists . Its not the mother's love that i mean ,the love of a partner .
No , i dont have a partner as of today , i am not in love as of today . All i am saying is that i believe that it exists . I understands that true love happens to only 1 in a 100 , but i will live with a hope that i am that one . I have never felt like this before , and i have always tried to ditch love for sex and fun .I have made mistakes in life , but i want to correct myself.
I am not saying that i have turned a saint , but i want to be in a realistic relation. I want to meet someone who loves me , the way i am , i want to love her (yea,im straight) , and i want to have kids like her .
Conversation between Pheno and Menon to continue .,
"Fuck Menon , you are drunk... "
"Its alright Pheno , you are just a disguise of what menon is "
"Do you think i am like you ? No way , i want to fuck many girls"
"Ofcourse , you may do that as well ,but you are not going to enjoy a bit of it.Believe in me , there is girl waiting for you"
"Dudeee , give me a break . You have no control of what to happen next "
"So what , hope makes life . I may not find her , but i will live with the dreams of finding her . I may get married to anyone my mom suggests ,but for sure , i will love her , will be faithful and good to her .. for a lifetime "
"Man, give me a break , lets talk when you are in your senses"
"Godnight Pheno , see you tomorrow"
But , i cant help it ,at 25 years and 5 months , i realise that love exists . Its not the mother's love that i mean ,the love of a partner .
No , i dont have a partner as of today , i am not in love as of today . All i am saying is that i believe that it exists . I understands that true love happens to only 1 in a 100 , but i will live with a hope that i am that one . I have never felt like this before , and i have always tried to ditch love for sex and fun .I have made mistakes in life , but i want to correct myself.
I am not saying that i have turned a saint , but i want to be in a realistic relation. I want to meet someone who loves me , the way i am , i want to love her (yea,im straight) , and i want to have kids like her .
Conversation between Pheno and Menon to continue .,
"Fuck Menon , you are drunk... "
"Its alright Pheno , you are just a disguise of what menon is "
"Do you think i am like you ? No way , i want to fuck many girls"
"Ofcourse , you may do that as well ,but you are not going to enjoy a bit of it.Believe in me , there is girl waiting for you"
"Dudeee , give me a break . You have no control of what to happen next "
"So what , hope makes life . I may not find her , but i will live with the dreams of finding her . I may get married to anyone my mom suggests ,but for sure , i will love her , will be faithful and good to her .. for a lifetime "
"Man, give me a break , lets talk when you are in your senses"
"Godnight Pheno , see you tomorrow"
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Valnetines day - Times have changed .
Times have changed , look at the V day wishes post i made last year ..
http://the-phenomenon-world.blogspot.com/2009/02/valentines-day-thoughts.html
I was like that ., fooling around girls and flirting , never cared about LOVE and emotions .
The last year had been a very important year for me . I realised several things in my life . I dont know if it was because i grew older , but i believe its because of the experiences that i had with relations .
You all know about this girl i have been going ga-ga for a long time . We talked briefly yesterday , and i made sure there are no intimate talks happening . This girl has played a major role in the turnover of my thoughts .
The most important change is that i have started to believe in love . It does not mean i am in love or being loved , but i now believe that it exists somewhere in the world . Also , for the first time in my life , i am expecting some girl with whom i can truly fall in love with .
Thats my heart speaking , but my brain still tells me that it can only happen to people of one in a billion . I am not expecting anything , especially for the way i had been all these days ., but if i get a chance , i am sure i would really like to fall in love .
Coming back to this girl , she has played an important role to make me feel this .Please note that we have never proposed , nor do i think that we are in love.But she had been a wonderful support and has given me meaningful suggestions to improve my life . She always understood me really well .
Now you would be thinking that 'Why are you not in LOVE' . Well , i dont really know , but speaking about marriage and love , i am not sure if we would make it a success. She is a wonderful friend , and i want it to stay like that , but the moment i start to think of her as a partner , a lot of bad things creep in to my mind , and we screw up the relation . At this point , i dont really think we will make a successful pair , especially because we are both similar kind and will not give up anything for another person .
Another change that has happened to me recently is that , i have started to respect women a lot more . I no longer walk around and call every other girl as a bitch . I feel that women deserve some respect .
The girl has definitely influenced me in improving my personality . As she always says , everything happens for good . She has also helped in improving my headache and stomach pain , but i shall forgive that .
I dont call her , scrap her , or send an email . I do this not because i dont think of her , as a matter of fact there is not a single day where i dont think of her , and pray for her ., but it is because at the moment , i believe there is no point in dragging a relation that i dont think would be a success .I tried several times to get back to her just for the heck of it , but whenever i did that it ended up in trouble . I am letting her live her life , and hoping that she understands me .
One thing is for sure , i only want to see her happy , where ever she is , whatever she is doing .
Belated Valentines day wishes to all . Some day , i will also celebrate a V day with someone i love :)
What the fuck , that was too sentimental emotional shit !!! :P
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
So i got a new look !
I mean , my blog got a new look . I still look like that lean ,fair, spectacle'd , genius kinda assole !
Its been a long time since i changed anything in here . Infact , im too lazy to sit back and make my blog look good . Also , if i try to make it too attractive , people may feel that i am girl in disguise . As you all know , i am a male chauvenist !
(WTF is the spelling for Chauvenist ? )
How's this new look ? Is it gona make many girls fall for me ? I have also decided to write more about Gay'ism as well .There is an increasing number of gays these days . I have recently discovered that Gay'ism is a contageous disease and its spreading fast in my office . Dont worry , i have decided to change the project .
How wonderful it will be if all the guys change to gay and i am the only one left ? I will have all the girls in the world .
What a fucked up thought . I just forgot for a moment that i am a male chauvenist !
Well guys , i am just trying to be funny . I know there is nothing to lol , and i am sorry that i dont deliver such goods these days . You know the stuff i've been going through , and i am in a recovery period. But things are way better now , and i feel that the recovery angel is almost near my door .
Shit ! There really is a recovery agent at my door . He , however will be looking for my credit card !
Its been a long time since i changed anything in here . Infact , im too lazy to sit back and make my blog look good . Also , if i try to make it too attractive , people may feel that i am girl in disguise . As you all know , i am a male chauvenist !
(WTF is the spelling for Chauvenist ? )
How's this new look ? Is it gona make many girls fall for me ? I have also decided to write more about Gay'ism as well .There is an increasing number of gays these days . I have recently discovered that Gay'ism is a contageous disease and its spreading fast in my office . Dont worry , i have decided to change the project .
How wonderful it will be if all the guys change to gay and i am the only one left ? I will have all the girls in the world .
What a fucked up thought . I just forgot for a moment that i am a male chauvenist !
Well guys , i am just trying to be funny . I know there is nothing to lol , and i am sorry that i dont deliver such goods these days . You know the stuff i've been going through , and i am in a recovery period. But things are way better now , and i feel that the recovery angel is almost near my door .
Shit ! There really is a recovery agent at my door . He , however will be looking for my credit card !
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